Life Lately:: Guilt, Priorities, and Finding Balance

Happy afternoon!! I hope that y’all are having a delightful Monday (well, as delightful as Monday’s can be).  Today, I’m feeling renewed after a weekend of non-stop studying.  No, I’m not being sarcastic.  Let me explain recent events::

As I mentioned in Life Lately:: Intentions, personal intentions are essential to a purpose driven life.  Recently, I’ve had a reminder of how important priorities are.  You see, we live in a world where productivity is expected and “over-scheduling” is encouraged.  “No” is not an optional answer.  Even though we have goals and intentions, life tends to fly by as we go through each day guided only by our iCal alerts.  We pack more and more into each day, because we can’t say NO.  We justify our response because we think that “they need me…” or “they expect me…” or “I can’t let them down…”.

Now I’m not saying that it’s wrong to help others out or to live up to our obligations.  I firmly believe in having a servant’s heart and to give what we can of ourselves to others.  What I’m talking about is when our actions of “intended selflessness” actually detour us from our goals.  Our inability to say “no” can literally turn our lives upside down.  Balance is the solution.

I often reflect on the quote, “Sometimes taking care of me, means saying no to you.”  It helps me to feel better about slimming down my schedule.  Now understand that I’m a worrier…  I’m guilty-hearted…. I can’t let go of obligations without obsessing over what I see as a personal “failure.”  This is ultimately my kryptonite.  And boy, has it hit me hard lately.

Towards the end of last week and over the weekend, I had a lot of analyzing to do and some big decisions to make.  Y’all, I’m 22 and for the past month or so have felt like I’m approaching a nervous breakdown (I only wish I was exaggerating).  Something needed to change… Luckily, I was able to draw from the solid (and always loving) advice of my family.  Sometimes, (and I think this applies to all of us) I need to be reassured that I’m not crazy for my thoughts and that I’m making good, fair decisions.  I can always rely on my family + friends to set me straight.

After making some tough decisions and sizing down my obligations, I was able to spend the entire weekend studying for a major exam I took this morning.  This was my first baby step towards a newly prioritized life.  It was sort of wonderful to have nothing to do but study…. I know, it’s kinda sad and pathetic, but in my life this is a luxury.

If you find yourself feeling overextended and short on time, re-evaluate your priorities to determine if they align with your goals.  Don’t be too hard on yourself!  Acknowledge your positive traits in what you do, and realize that you have limits.  You are responsible for yourself… be sure to take care, after all, you are the only “you” there will ever be.  Make this the best week ever!


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